(no subject)

You are bidding on an unused, genuine Alex Moctor sex spoon. This is one of a limited edition of only 12 spoons, and entitles you to a single shag from Mr Alex Moctor! Please note that you must return the spoon to Mr Moctor upon the sucessful consummation of whatever bizarre sexual act the pair of you decide to engage in.

(no subject)

( I think I just broke something in my chest by laughing too hard... )